Monday, April 25, 2016

Prince's definition of masculinity and a prayer for redefining the term alpha

The more I read about Prince, the more I discover what a gift he was to the evolution of our species. I know when Lao Tzu said "know the masculine but keep to the feminine," he was talking about Prince.  Prince gave permission to men to develop a masculinity that wasn't about bullying, dominating, or any kind of hierarchy.  His genius was in enlightening humanity to embrace the power of their own sexuality with out any kind of shame.  He was for raising humanity up and his music was filled with the kind of joy that speaks right to the heart of the matter.   He demonstrated a beautiful balance of feminine and masculine energy in his artistry and his persona.  The world is hungry for a new definition of the "Alpha Male" one that empowers men to get in touch with vulnerability, sensitivity, intuition and receptivity.

For the past 2 years I have had the joy of coaching boys volleyball here in Santa Monica and while I love the courage that they show and the work ethic that they demonstrate. I have seen first hand the destructive nature of the idea of alpha male hierarchy.  The boy's fear of looking weak inhibit them from being coached and inhibit them from opening to the support of one another.  They put each other down and joke about sexuality. They fear failure way more than the girls that I coach and in a few cases I see a reluctance to take coaching from a woman.  It is hard to overcome the male ego when the idea of being a 'man' in society has been muddled with idea of power, dominance, and strength. The Mask You Live In is a wonderful documentary that discusses the harm we are doing to young boys by perpetuating unrealistic arbitrary rules about manhood.  A myth that being a man is all about not showing emotion or weakness. When in fact, it is from passivity and quiet receptivity that our deepest intuitive, creative power resides!

If we hope to have just a sliver of the amount of alpha power that inspires Prince's greatness, we will all have to get in touch with the balance between active and passive energy. The dance between Shiva and Shakti in yoga terms. The balance of yin and yang energy in Chinese medicine.  The mix of blue and pink that produce purple, Prince's Purple Rein!  Now that is a power that is worth supporting. Below is a passage about balancing the male and female energy from Shakti Gawain's Living in the Light.

Accessing the Male & the Female Within

Each of us has male and female energies within us. I believe that one of the most important challenges we have in this world is to develop these energies fully, so they can interact in harmony with each other.
Some people have resistance to the words female and male, because in our culture we have so many preconceived ideas about what those words mean. If it’s more comfortable for you, substitute the words yin and yang,active and receptivedynamic and magnetic, or any other words that appeal to you.

The Masculine and Feminine Aspects of Our Being

Our female communicates to us through our intuition — those inner promptings, gut feelings, or images that come from a deep place within us. If we don’t pay conscious attention to her in our waking life, she attempts to reach us through our dreams, our emotions, and our physical body. She is the source of higher wisdom within us, and if we learn to listen carefully to her, moment by moment, she will guide us perfectly.
The male aspect is action — our ability to do things in the physical world — to think, to speak, to move our bodies. Again, whether you are a man or a woman, your masculine energy is your ability to act. The feminine receives the universal creative energy and the masculine expresses it in the world through action — thus, we have the creative process.
For example, an artist might awaken with an inspired idea for a painting (an image communicated from his female) and immediately go into his studio, pick up his brush, and begin painting (action taken by his male).
A mother might feel sudden concern for her child (a warning from her inner female), and run into the other room and pull the child away from a hot stove (action taken by her male).
A businessperson might have an impulse to contact a certain associate (guidance from his or her female), make a call (action taken by his or her male), and put together a new deal.

Integrating Your Female and Male Energies

Having your female and male energies fully developed and integrated will allow you to live a harmonious and creative life. To fully integrate the inner male and female, you need to put the female in the guiding position. This is her natural function. She is your intuition, the door to your higher intelligence.
Remember now that I am talking about an internal process in each of us. Sometimes people externalize this idea and think I’m saying that men should let women tell them what to do! What I’m actually saying is that weeach need to let our intuition guide us, and then be willing to follow that guidance directly and fearlessly.
I often imagine my male as standing behind my female — supporting, protecting, and “backing her up.” For a man, the image might be reversed — you might see your female as within or behind you, guiding, empowering, nurturing, and supporting you. When these two energies are thus in harmony and working together, it’s an incredible feeling: a strong, open, creative channel, with power, wisdom, peace, and love flowing through.


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